Monday 12 March 2012
The weather Changed for the worst by Abigail P4
Autumn and Summer were children of Spring and Winter. One day Winter said to them, Autumn and Summer your dad and I have planned a vacation spot for us to go. Dad is going to Mexico, Autumn is going to Nigeria, Summer is going to Sahara desert, and finally I’m going to America .what do you all say about that, asked the Mom? It's okay chorused everyone with dad’s loud voice. It's okay said Autumn with brotherly voice. Its okay said Summer with a baby voice not feeling okay and the weather changed for the worst.
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4 comments:
Hello Abigail,
This is a wonderfully written entry for the 100WC. It is very creative and appeals to my liking of fantasy writing.
The only suggestion I could make would be to consider using speech marks to show exactly which words were spoken, for example...
"It's okay," said Autumn with a brotherly voice.
I most certainly hope you continue to enter the 100WC. For a first entry, this is very impressive. Well done. :)
@RossMannell (Team 100WC)
Teacher, NSW, Australia
This is a very special piece for this prompt Abigail. I love the personification you have used for the different weather as well as the way you have linked them to different places. Very clever writing!
There is something about this story that captured my mind. It shows how creative you are with things around you.
I believe there is still more coming from where this scintillating story comes from.
Up Abigail!!!
This is awesome! I love how you personified the seasons and turned this into a story. Well done!
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